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THEN THERE WAS GWAR! RELICS FROM A BONGLIZARD'S COLLECTION.

Updated: Mar 29

GWAR, the ultimate band. I have been a loyal follower since the 'Scumdog' era. In my formative years, like many I was obsessed with GWAR and it has lasted to this very day. Its been well documented in the past volumes of Bonglizard through interviews and reviews. GWAR have spanned nearly 4 decades and they have maintained a cult following like no other. The fan base are very dedicated and many help preserve the history of the band through collecting various artifacts of GWAR memorabilia and art. For example check out the following You Tube channels 'The House of masks', 'GWAR pod' and 'What did you do in the GWAR' with Don Drakulich.


So here it goes, I thought I would share with you 10 categories featuring some unearthed relics from my personal vault relating to GWAR and the story behind them, just for the provenance to be known.... and because GWAR FUCKIN RULE!!!! If any GWAR fans out there want to let me know any info regarding what I included that's much appreciated or maybe you want to say what's the favorite GWAR relic in your collection? Drop a comment below Scumdogs and HAIL GWAR!



1 - GWAR fan club cassettes :

This is the full collection of the apparently hard to find GWAR fan club issued cassettes. I joined the fan club after these were released but had heard about the legend of these tapes and basically wrote it off as I would never find a set. In the early days of Ebay way back, I was actually lucky enough to secure a full set from a GWAR fan in Germany. When talking to Mike Derks ( Balsac ) years later he said he remembers putting these cassettes together and assured me there is not many full sets of these out there. I have asked many fans about these over the years and it seems this is true. In knowing this, it makes them even more unique and also the 1st cassette had been signed by Balsac, Beefcake and Slymenstra Hymen which was and added bonus. The 2 promotional cassettes are for 'Ragnarok' and 'We kill everything', these were sent to me on joining the fan club.



2 - Signed We kill everything press photo :

A gift from the one and only legend that was Crazy White Sean. Me and Sean got to know each other at the first GWAR show I attended in 2000, where he was the opening support act as the one man Freak show. It's now noted that The 'We Kill everything' era was a strange time for GWAR in hindsight as the trials and tribulations in the band although unknown to the fans at the time was reaching a boiling point. A huge change was coming with the sound and also the members of the band. Techno Destructo was gone and Scroda Moon was introduced as the new character played by Hunter Jackson. After meeting up with Sean many times at his place in Amsterdam over the years and knowing how wild I was over GWAR, He kindly gave me this personal tour press photo along with an X cops poster. Sean was moving out of his apartment at the time. He looked at me and said with a grin ' I got so much stuff to move and i'm not throwing these out, so man you gotta have these, I want you to have them and that's a rare signature right there' pointing to Scroda Moon. Personally this photo means a lot because of that moment. R.I.P Sean you are truly missed and thanks for the memories.



3 - 20th anniversary GWAR statues and Sleazy P. Martini Nodder by Don Drakulich :

The Sleazy P. Martini nodder and GWAR figures I ordered from Don Drakulich. The Sleazy nodder is probably not that rare but it's fuckin awesome all the same. Handmade and painted from the man himself via His Hypereal productions company. I truly dig this head nodder like no other. Also included here are the more hard to find original release GWAR hand painted figures. What sucks is moving houses and various storage accidents over the years have damaged the packaging and it disturbs this scumdog greatly. The boxes are all signed and figures are in mint condition and have never been opened until now. Nearly 20 years later, I finally took them out just for the photographs below and I'm glad I did as the detail is stunning. Now you can also see how cool they are, really great art and awesome heavy figures that captivate the spirit of GWAR.















4 - Blood of the Gods Signed poster :

One of the most recent amendments to my collection. This poster was issued with the vinyl and is now signed by the band minus Pustulus. I managed to get this done the last time GWAR slayed the venue in Bristol on the Dark ages tour in 2022. It's displayed and framed on the wall now and It makes my day every time I see it.



5 - The first 3 albums on vinyl signed by Oderus and Beefcake :

These albums have been with me for years. I bought 'Live from Antarctica' VHS and 'Scumdogs of the Universe' vinyl around 1990/91. This was as soon as I seen the 'Black and Huge' promo video on Raw power, the metal rock magazine show that was on TV once a week in the U.K in the early 90's. I Then secured 'America must be destroyed' on first release along with the second repress of 'Hello' on CD by Metal Blade (not pictured). These are the very albums that actually changed my life in respect of music and what GWAR are to me. Before the internet existed bands had a more mysterious factor, back then that's all you had were the records, interviews in magazines or TV interviews if you managed to see it or tape it on video. GWAR looked insane, what little footage existed in the UK was legendary. This was the golden days of GWAR as they had not yet gone onto to carve out the well known monster that you know to this day. These albums have many a memory attached as well as being stared at, studied and spun thousands of times. All 3 covers encapsulate GWAR perfectly for me due to the rough, raw style and look of the artwork that made this band stand out in a way I cannot describe, at the time there was nothing like this. The 'Hello' vinyl is an original Shimmy disc press that I managed to get in the early 2000's. These particular records are in the list because they have all been signed by Oderus with a cartoon sketch. The Beefcake signatures on these are all by Todd Evans who joined GWAR later on down the line. These vinyls were signed in Bristol when GWAR were touring the 'War party' album. After the passing of Dave Brockie these became very important in my collection as like all my other GWAR signed stuff, they can never be replicated.





6 - Signed CD's :

From hounding GWAR every chance I got, I managed to amass a decent collection of signed CD's. Every show I always have a bunch of albums with me, because what's better than having the albums you love signed by the actual creators of the music that have been the soundtrack to your life. I highly appreciate how GWAR will take time to hang around with their fans, they are genuine, down to earth and have always had time to talk with me. This has always really meant a lot to me. There really is no bullshit with this band, I hate to be an ultimate bohab but fuck it. Without GWAR the world would suck even more than it does now.


Photo signatures :

LET THERE BE GWAR : JIZMAK, BALSAC, FLATTUS ( Cory Smoot ), BEEFCAKE ( Casey Orr )

THIS TOILET EARTH / ORIGINAL PRESS : JIZMAK, BALSAC, BEEFCAKE ( Michael Bishop )

RAGNAROK : JIZMAK, BALSAC, BEEF ( Casey Orr )

WE KILL EVERYTHING : JIZMAK, BALSAC, BEEFCAKE ( Casey Orr )

VIOLENCE HAS ARRIVED : ODERUS, HAIL BEEFCAKE ( Todd Evans )

WAR PARTY : HAIL BEEFCAKE ( Todd Evans )

BEYOND HELL : FLATTUS ( Cory Smoot ), JIZMAK, BALSAC, BEEFCAKE ( Casey Orr ), SLAVE OF GWAR ( Matt Maguire )

LUST IN SPACE : ODERUS, JIZMAK, BALSAC, FLATTUS ( Cory Smoot ), BEEF ( Casey Orr ), SAWBORG ( Matt Maguire )

BLOODY PIT OF HORROR : JIZMAK, BALSAC, BEEF ( Casey Orr )

BATTLE MAXIMUS : JIZMAK, BALSAC, BEEF ( Casey Orr ), BLOTHAR

SLAVES GOIN SINGLE : JIZMAK, BALSAC, BEEF ( Casey Orr )

YOU'RE ALL WORTHLESS AND WEAK : ODERUS

LIVE FROM MT. FUJI : JIZMAK, BALSAC, BEEF ( Casey Orr ), FLATTUS ( Cory Smoot ), SLAVE OF GWAR ( Matt Maguire )

DBX : DIARRHEA OF A MADMAN : DAVE BROCKIE

DBX : SONGS FOR THE WRONG : SUPER B, DERKS

DBX : LIVE FROM GROUND ZERO : DERKS

X - COPS : YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT : BIFF BUFF, LT SCRAPINETTI, TUBB TUCKER, DEAD GUY ( Matt Maguire )





7 - GWAR gore soaked gig T-shirts :

After the first GWAR show I was sad to see the T-shirt come out of the washer clean. To stop this happening I let these ones dry out and never wore them again. These remain Preserved with all GWAR fluids from the 'War Party', 'Beyond Hell' and 'Blood of the gods' shows. The 'Time for death' shirt is a rare one from 1991 and was my first ever GWAR T-shirt, The Total slavery shirt was issued to fan club members and the 'Scumdogs' T-shirt is a repress I got at a show in the 2000's sometime. I will more or likely frame these in future.






8 - Original VHS cassette movies :

Where it all began for me with the 'Live from Antarctica' VHS. The only thing that looks dated here is the stupid fuckin CENSORED screens that drop over the UK version of this cassette. Laughable now but I could never understand why they would censor this, what sensitive cunts those British Board of Film Censors (BBFC) were back then. The card slip case version is uncut. GWAR videos were the greatest, 'Phallus in wonderland' and 'Skulhedface' went onto become cult classics. The videos that were the hardest for me to track down were 'The Return of Techno Destructo', 'TVD' and 'The Next Mutation' as they were not readily available in the U.K. I never had covers for these but I bought them from a GWAR fan in America via Ebay back in the early 2000's. So I assume they are copied. Although the writing on the Techno tape look like its by Hunter Jackson, but I cant clarify that, if anyone can help me out on this it would be appreciated, would they ever hand sign the labels or sell them in a clear box? When I got these in the post I went berserk to say the least, I finally had some of the tapes that I had always heard and read about and I was not disappointed, that day was a GWAR day!



9 - GWAR jacket :

One of my all time favorite pieces of clothing, this jacket has practically been every where with me. The classic Balsac image with Blood splat logo is fading now but still looks incredible. Long gone has the Scumdog lettering down the arm due to wear and tear, but it still looks great. I actually got sized up and sold this by Brad Roberts just before the interview in Bonglizard in 2007. So it's not just any normal jacket to me, It's an actual GWAR jacket fitted for me by the GWAR drum destroyer, Jizmak da Gusher.



10- Certificate of Slavery / Frenchy membership card :

This was an awesome welcome to the world of GWAR as a fan club member. The statement sums it up really, I was number 1119. This certificate is not that rare but it is still super fuckin cool as its officially signed by Jizmak. I Don't know how many members this club reached in total, but back in the day this was the real exclusive access to GWAR products direct from the band. It came with the T-shirt (see section 7 above) and the GWAR frenchy logo membership card that I carried for years and years.



So that's it for now, I have more GWAR things in my collection and loads of live photos. R.I.P to the legends Dave Brockie and Cory Smoot. Maybe i will do a part 2 to this blog one day. Until then stay un-tuned for more on the next BONGLIZARD installment on BLOGLIZARD coming soon!....Oh yeah don't forget to LISTEN TO GWAR!!!!










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